Alone not Lonely

My husband, who was my best friend for 47 years, fell off a ladder onto concrete & died in 2009. Since then I have learned how to live alone. There have been many discoveries along the way:-

• I can do it & like my own company.
• A few of my "friends" weren't, but many more "aquaintances" were.
• Real friends are rare & to be treasured.
• People generally are kind & want to help. Asking for & taking help is difficult if you value independence.
• None of us prepare for the "worst case scenario", so it's a struggle.
• Marriages are partnerships & we all develop our own role within them. So when you have to do everything yourself it's hard & is time consuming.
• Every achievement outside your comfort zone gives you confidence for solving the next problem.
• Facing the fear works - I think of the worst case scenario and accept that it might happen, but statistically it probably won't. 
• I resolved not to say no to anything that was on offer. So I have done more outside the house than I did when I was married.
• Doing something for other people takes one's mind off oneself. I have several volunteer "jobs" & get a great deal from all of them.
• To be interesting you have to be interested - in people & all sorts of things.
• No one want's to spend more than the minimum time with a self absorbed moaner.
• Whatever has happened to me in my life, however painful and hard, is nothing in comparison to what is happening to many other people in the world this very minute.

We learn by experiencing life's journey. I wish that there could be a micro chip to insert into the brain to make us wise without traumatic experience, but maybe pain is necessary.