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Saturday 30 June 2012

Limits & Limitations

We seem to be living in an age of no limits or limitations. No limits to the depths to which human beings will sink in all spheres of their lives. No limitations on their behaviour because inertia, political expediency, cowardice, power & greed prevent the action which should be taken.

If you look at crime against children, people & humanity we seem to see the same sorts of ill treatment, neglect, abuse & worse happening over and over again. Each time someone says "we must learn the lessons" or " we must ensure this never happens again". But it does. Rarely is anyone brought to trial. If they are, the trial goes on for a farcical amount of time & costs vast sums of money.

If you look at financial crime, one begins to wonder whether there are any depths that people won't sink to at the prospect of huge monetary rewards. It is crime against anyone who uses the banking system in any way, which is everyone. Yet how many have been charged with any offence, let alone punished? Instead they reward themselves with huge salaries & even bigger bonuses simply for doing their job - or not.

There is no point in having laws if they don't protect the poor & weak. There is no point in a justice system which doesn't dispense justice. There is no point in having sanctions if they aren't applied rigorously & fairly. We seem to have reached a point where rules are either simply not enforced or are uninforcable.

Who or what protects us now? Who will curb the aberrant behaviour which goes across the class divide. Who sets the limits, but more importantly who enforces the limitations? Seemingly no one.

We aren't just a failed state, or a failed Western civilisation. We are a failed world. Anarchy is snapping at the heels of "democracy".

Thursday 28 June 2012

Memory

Yesterday was the 3rd anniversary of David falling off a ladder whilst doing something on the roof. Plus sa change, ne plus pas ce meme chose. It's hard.

Saturday 23 June 2012

Progress

I am progressing from birth to death. So are you. But what is progress?

Is it simply more of everything including wealth? I've certainly got more posessions now than when I was young. I can buy more or less anything that I want, although as I get older there is less and less that I desire. In fact I have gone to the opposite extreme in that I have been trying to divest myself of more and more stuff over the last decade. Interestingly, it's quite hard to sell or even give stuff away. Nobody wants second hand stuff now except the poor. Even antiques have lost their value. Everything has to be shiney and new & "on trend". What's more we are programmed to change & consume. Clothes, our homes - kitchens, bathrooms, technology etc, all have to be the latest design, so we accept as normal "built in obsolescence". Nothing lasts.

The greedy rush for more wealth has led us to the edge of a cliff & no one knows what will happen if we fall off it. We do know that, if we fall, it will dramatically change our world for the worse & may be irreversible. The repercussions of a worse financial mess than we are in currently will affect every human being on the planet, except possibly tribes in very isolated places. It may well unleash civil unrest on a scale much worse than anything so far. Maybe the tribes have got it right.

Does progress really mean something better? Is it better that we can prolong the life of very ill patients, make infertile people parents, let very pre term babies live....? We have developed the skills & the technology and the advances are truly astonishing. But, we have a seriously overpopulated world, with an ever widening gap between the have's and the have nots, and a chasm between the Western world and the developing world. We have the brains to make these huge developments, but they aren't available to all, and millions would just like enough to eat and clean water.

Has our concept of progress made us happy? Apparently not when you see the statistics for depression & psychological problems. Not to mention drug and alcohol dependency.

In the West we have health problems previously unknown - Anorexia, Bulimia, Obesity, as well as more people suffering from all the usual diseases like Diabetes at a much earlier age. Isn't it ironic that this is a result of a truly unhealthy relationship with food? Progress has introduced food made in factories & divorced us from the reality of natural foods & a balanced diet. Progress has meant that the kitchen is rarely used for cooking proper meals which we sit down & share with our families. We have a world of choice on the shelves of our supermarkets & we are killing ourselves.

I have progressed through life & seen huge progress in all areas of that life. My problem is that I don't see the value in, or sustainability of, much of that so called progress. What I see is a civilisation making expedient, selfish & short term choices without understanding the long term consequences of their actions. Real progress would be if we stopped, now, and started making the hard decisions which might, just, save the human species. Sadly I don't think it will happen.

I'm quite glad that I'm closer to the end of my progress than the beginning.

Saturday 16 June 2012

All in the Best Possible Taste

I'm a big fan of Grayson Perry. Not only do I think he is a brilliant artist, I think he has the knack of being highly intelligent & observant without being in the least bit pretentious or egotistical. That must be unique in the art world.

His current series on TV is fascinating on many levels. His observations, both in what he sees & what he says are insightful. He is able to relate to & draw out, (excuse the pun), all sorts of people, so that they reveal themselves. Listening without patronising or mocking. From that rich tapestry he makes real tapestries, summing up in a delightful way the essence of the people & worlds he has observed. The tapestries themselves are a joy.

The programmes make you look at yourself and try to analyse what makes you tick & where you fit into the hierarchical structure of class. I started life in a working class home in Quinton in Birmingham. My father was a copper smelter who worked nights feeding a furnace, a hard and dangerous job. My mother worked part time in various jobs, the Kunzle cake factory, & the Chad Valley toy factory were two I remember.  Money was tight, but they, (& the bank), owned their semi detatched house.

I remember a post war childhood of hard work & very little in the way of material things. New clothes were an annual event as I grew out of what I had. Toys and books were very few. We had a radio, but no TV. I walked to school on my own. I played in the street or the back garden with the other kids. The house was bitterly cold in the winter as there was only one fire in the back living room. I never went hungry, but food was simple & basic. My mother shopped & cooked every day. Chicken was a huge treat as was tinned salmon.

Me going to Grammar school must have been a big financial burden for my parents, who by then had moved into a bigger semi on the Wolverhampton Road. So we took in two lodgers - students from Birmingham university. Looking back I think my mother was amazing to afford the Startright shoes and compulsory uniform including velour winter hat from an expensive outfitters in Birmingham. She was buying me a passport to a better life having been denied an education herself although she was undoubtedly intelligent.

Even when I went to Trent Park College to do Art & train as a teacher I was hard up. I got a grant, but my parents were supposed to contribute as well. They never seemed to have the money. So I went through the whole three years with a duffle coat & one pair of jeans. I remember the joy of Hall of Residence, followed by lodgings & finally a shared house. I learned to cook & manage my money.

I also widened my whole experience. I met people from all walks of life, some very wealthy in comparison to me. The world of art, music & drama opened up to me & I developed my own style & taste. I had studied architecture at A level & now saw famous buildings in London for myself. Because I had played the piano as a child I was immersed in classical music, but I discovered a much wider love of all sorts of music.

So I graduated & became a teacher. A fully fledged member of the professional classes. I married a man who also had a degree & professional career. Without noticing I had left the working class behind & in so doing I had probably left my parents behind too. After all their hard work and sacrifice they had produced a cuckoo.

Looking at Grayson Perry's 2nd programme about the Middle Classes I was hard pushed to find myself. I'm certainly not in the label & lifestyle, consumerist, group. I don't see myself in the Upper Middle Classes either. I'm somewhere out on a limb. Still harking back to my roots & shaped by my first 25 years without very much money at all. So I could go out now and buy all the things by which people define themselves. But those things don't mean anything at all to me. They are the "Emperors New Clothes" & sooner or later I hope people will realise that.

My daughter probably fits quite well in the Ethical / Eco / NCT group of Middle Class. She is very fortunate & has never experienced being hard up or wanted for anything. She has had a privileged life without struggle and I'm delighted in her & for her.

But, I wonder whether adversity & struggle are important determinants of our humanity & personality. I am the sum of my parts & oddly I think they have all been important - the wonderful and the downright disastrous.

Friday 15 June 2012

Passing the Time

When I was younger & had a husband & child to look after, a house & garden to maintain, a demanding professional job & a busy social life I never had enough time. My life was minutely choreographed so that everything got done & everyones needs were met. I was the juggler who kept all the plates spinning, or in darker moments the hamster in an ever spinning wheel. That life ended in a physical & mental breakdown & early retirement at 46 on medical grounds.

No one & nothing prepares you for ageing. In many ways it's a "magical mystery tour", except that for many there's nothing magical about it. It's an individual journey which varies enormously from person to person. A lot depends on the hand you have been dealt. Partner / no partner. Caring family / no family. Close friends / lonliness. Health / illness. Home / institution of some sort. Enough money / poverty.

You will have / not have these things to varying degrees which will make your ageing process a reasonably pleasurable thing or a dreadful experience. I think I am somewhere in the middle, more fortunate than many, but far from ideal.

My father used to drive me to intense frustration in his old age because whenever I suggested an outing or doing something he would say "if you like" or "it will pass the time". The younger me hadn't experienced what I now do experience, so I didn't understand. Time can stretch out yawningly wide ahead of you each day, so you have to try to fill it. Whole days may pass without speaking to anyone, even on the telephone.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not sobbing into my mug of tea. (The time to worry will be when it's a big gin & tonic mid morning!) I have a relatively full life because I work at it. I volunteer, I have made networks of friends & aquaintances through shared interests like reading, swimming & walking. I have a loving daughter & some really good friends who include me in their lives.

But, & it's a big but, the house is empty when I come home & when I go to bed. I have chronic conditions which are ever more limiting what I am able to do. I have to have paid help with the housework & the garden. If I try to do those physical tasks I will be in pain for several days afterwards. It is frustrating not to be able to do things which you previously took for granted & enjoyed. It is also frustrating to have to rely on someone else to do simple things for you & wait till they are around to be able to do them. I couldn't spray the weeds with Roundup because I simply couldn't unscrew the cap of the sprayer.

On the plus side I can afford paid help. I can afford to do the things I want to do & at the moment I can still drive. I have kind and helpful neighbours. My life could be a lot worse. (Realistically it will get worse as I age & become more infirm).

I am learning how to pass the time & haven't yet resorted to daytime TV! I have had to learn to accept much less conversation & activity. I have learnt to be more self reliant & independent - not difficult because I already was. I accept that there will not be, & I don't think I would want, another Dave to share my remaining life with.

The difficult trick to master is to "Carpe Diem", sieze the day rather than just drift though it. I am too task oriented & not good at "fun". I need to practice.

Tuesday 5 June 2012

Jubilee Jubilation?

I haven't been watching much, apart from part of the concert last night & snippets on the news.

There's something very out of kilter about spending vast amounts of money, when we are supposed to be virtually bankrupt, celebrating one of the richest women in the world. How can the money be found for this in the same year that we are all being asked to tolerate varying degrees of austerity?

Historically there is nothing new in such events. They have often been staged, quite cynically, to take people's minds off their own troubles & divert them from political realities. Such diversion can only ever be temporary however. People know when their lives are being drastically affected in a negative way. They experience it daily. So the euphoria will pass. Reality will set in & I hope the public will question the decisions the politicians have made.

I would admire the Queen far more if she had said that she didn't feel the celebration of her Jubilee should be as ostentatious in the current climate. I doubt she or her family or household are feeling the pinch at all. But a little awareness of the thousands of her subjects who are would have been welcome. It feels like the last binge of a party before the Bailiffs come.

What sensible household invites all their mates to a bit of a do when they have lost their job or have had their wages frozen or reduced? If they do, sure all their friends & neighbours will have a whale of a time at their expense. Just as everyone was having a great time at the concert last night. What happens the day after? A big hangover & reality. Our rulers & leaders have lost their sense of what is appropriate. They seem to believe all the PR hype in the bubble of the "media"world.

The Queen has done a job. For a long time. Sometimes she has done it superbly, sometimes not. So have millions of her subjects, in far less luxurious & comfortable circumstances. She has probably paid a personal price for doing that job. So do we all. Lets not get swept up in the current wave of sycophancy.