“..those who are 20 don't know what it's like to be 40, whereas those who are 40 know what it's like to be 20. It's a bit like discussing a foreign country with somebody who has never been there” - Alexander McCall Smith.
It seems to me that this is an eternal problem at any age. But it is compounded by the fact that those younger than us seemingly don't value our experience, and think we are completely out of touch with their lives & what they are feeling. Whereas, in truth, we have been there, seen it, done it & got the T Shirt! The detail may change, but the underlying emotions & drivers remain.
They, on the other hand, have no experience of what it is like to be older, so are largely unable to empathise. They simply don't know the questions to ask, let alone have the interest to find out more. 'Twas ever thus.... youth is deeply preoccupied with it's own life & doesn't have the time or inclination to delve deeply into the lives of their parents or older people generally.
This divide is seemingly immutable, apart from a few very special people who do take the time to have really two way conversations with older people. They are genuinely interested enough to probe & listen & try to get to know the older person. It then becomes a proper relationship between two people which crosses the age divide.
Of course it does depend enormously on the older person too. Are they interesting & interested? Do they listen or want to give advice & their opinion on everything? Are they lively and fun or boring & insular?
I think both parties have to work quite hard at being aware of how they behave towards others & what their attitudes are to people of a different generation. It is very easy to slip into self satisfied prejudices. I don't know whether I can do it, but I am trying.
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