Government - of the people, by the people, for the people?

I've left blogging about this for a couple of days to mull my anger over.

I listened to Alok Sharma, secretary of state for business, energy & industrial strategy, on Radio 4's Today programme on Thursday. I was really angry. He was just like Paul denying Jesus three times before the cock crowed. Except that he denied more times & wouldn't answer a relevant direct question. This happens all the time. There must be a really good politicians course on evasion & not taking responsibility.

It's all about the appointment of Chris Grayling to head the Joint Intelligence & Security Committee.Yes Chris (Failing) Grayling, the man with the Midas touch for Mishandling.  In charge of a sensitive & vital committee for which he has no experience or qualifications. I didn't think anything this government could do would shock me any more - but this really does.

So Julian Lewis, a man with really good experience in this area, put himself forward as chairman as Grayling was the governments "shoe in". How outrageous. A conservative, perfectly legitimately, standing against the governments choice! How dare he?

So Boris & Cummings had the Whip withdrawn from Lewis, which means he is out in the cold. Unbelievable, childish spite & totally unjustified. The whole point of the J I & S Committee is that it is completely independent of government. But that isn't what this poor excuse of a government wants. They want to control the message - always.

Sharma's response to questioning was that " it's a matter for the Whips". Over & over again. He effectively denied Cabinet collective responsibility for the decision. Ridiculous! Don't they realise that we can see right through them?

Fortunately another conservative, Malcolm Rifkind, has more backbone & experience. He had no problem denouncing this whole charade & making clear that the J I & S Committee is supposed to be totally non partisan. The government should not interfere in any way.

Where are all the good, honest, public service politicians? They are there. But they are overwhelmed by the boot licking, self serving, utterly morally deficient, ones who have no difficulty cheating, prevaricating & lying.

There has to be a reckoning. This is not democracy.

Corona - Whingeing

Corona has disrupted everyone's life. I listened to a man on radio 4 today who had literally lost his successful business overnight & didn't get any support from the Government. There are apparently thousands, even millions, in this situation. Unsurprisingly the man was devastated. I have friends who work in the Arts who are in this position. A few may have savings, but if so, they were for the future, not day to day living for months. Some may have skills with which they can generate some income. Some have neither.

Conversely, the Government have given billions to airlines, which are private companies run by very wealthy individuals, with no strings attached. Private companies should be just that. They can't have their cake & eat it. In many cases the cake was more a gateau with plenty of cream for the top echelon.

The airline bosses whinged to government & the government opened it's coffers willingly. Just like it did for the bankers. The money it gave was our money - yours & mine. From taxes. How dare they? Whilst ordinary people struggle to keep going, to feed families, to get through from day to day. Facing goodness knows what tomorrow, because surviving this will take a lot for a great many people. The 2010 Child Poverty Act pledged to end child poverty by 2020. They aren't going to make it. The Conservatives abolished it in 2016.
https://www.ons.gov.uk/economy/nationalaccounts/uksectoraccounts/compendium/economicreview/february2020/childpovertyandeducationoutcomesbyethnicity

Most people I know don't whinge. Most of them just make the best of it. They follow the guidelines & advice. They look out for others. They try to do what is right. There are a few who do moan & say poor me, why is this happening to me? 'Twas ever thus - They were always inclined to do that & probably always will be. They don't have the capacity for real empathy or seeing how fortunate they really are compared to many others.

Whingeing is never pretty - but the wealthy whingeing is downright sickening. The wealthy should be using the money their businesses have made for them over the years for the good of others. Seeing the profligacy & ostentation of some of the really rich "in the time of Corona" is even worse than normally.

No one actually needs millions or billions for personal use. That money could get us out of the hole we are in, & will be in for years to come, in a flash. But it won't happen, because there simply isn't enough philanthropy & sharing of wealth. There are 54 billionaires in the UK today. In 2018 there were  357,200 millionaires in London alone. Of those 4,750 were worth $30 million or more.

Frankly I think that is obscene. But I would, wouldn't I? I'm a liberal socialist. 

Memory

It's interesting what remains in our memory & what doesn't. There doesn't seem to be much logic in what's discarded. I can't remember very much about my childhood or even teenage years. I also can't remember what I did yesterday or what I'm going to do tomorrow. So I have to have strategies. The main one is my mobile phone, which has my current life on it. I have to have reminders about really trivial things like changing the sheets.

I remember the events of today in 2009 really clearly though. What I don't remember, unless it's in my calendar, is the date itself. It's my 54th wedding anniversary & the date my husband died 11 years ago. You would think that the juxtaposition of the two would be forever fixed in my brain.

We had 43 years of marriage. So in many respects I was very lucky. There were highs & lows. There was a lot of shared experience, a lot of joy, but also disagreements & differences in personality. There were difficult times when we had very little money - egg & chips several times a week because it was cheap. There were also times when we realised that our professional lives gave us a very good standard of living. Money & posessions do not make for a good marriage. Love & tolerance do.

So I do try to make a special effort to remember today. Not in a sad way, not grieving any more. But because for 47 years of my life David was the most important thing in my life, the one constant that I could always rely on what ever happened.

Corona - Acceptance

I'm reading a book a friend gave me - "The Salt Path" by Raynor Winn.
https://www.bigissuenorth.com/reading-room/2019/04/author-qa-raynor-winn/#close

It's a very life affirming book & I am completely in awe of what she & her husband Moth achieved. I simply do not know how they had the physical & mental strength to do what they did. I'm looking forward to her next book due out this September - "The Wild Silence".

Reading the book made me think about "Acceptance". In a way it's a good book to read in the midst of the Covid 19 pandemic. There is so much that has changed in all our lives & none of it has been under our control.

I used to think that acceptance was not a good thing at all. I spent most of my life trying to change things that I thought were either wrong or could be better. I once went on a management course when I was a headteacher. One of the tests revealed that I was a "Reformer". I hadn't really thought about that before, but realised that it was true. I could always see a better way to do things. I could always see what changes needed to be made. I couldn't leave well alone if it could function better.

Age has tempered the reforming zeal. I accept that my single voice will not change the world for the better. I also accept that things are rarely simple & binary. The big questions are always complex. You do have to accept some things in this life.

I can't accept unfairness, discrimination, unequal opportunity, infringement of human rights, the wanton destruction of our complex eco system, corrupt politicians & a corporate hierarchy hell bent on profit at all costs. There has to be a moral compass if society & wildlife is to survive.

I can accept that I am ageing, that my body isn't as good as it was, that my memory lets me down, that I live alone, that I can't travel to far flung & interesting places any more, meeting people with a different culture. There are all sorts of things that I have become habituated to - being unable to run, kneel down & get up again, do the housework, stay awake when reading... There is a long list.

Fighting adversity & unfairness is hard work. It's draining, physically & mentally. It always has been & will be mainly for the young & fit. I can still make my voice heard, but I can't go on marches any more. I certainly couldn't do a sit in - or even a stand in come to that. I'd never get up or be able to walk again!

I hope that there will always be people who challenge wrong, who stand up for right. But I am glad that I've learned a measure of acceptance. More than 3 months of shielding would have been intolerable if I hadn't.

Corona - Life's Losses

Oddly, I think it's only this week that it has dawned on me just what I have lost due to Covid 19. Worse, that the losses may, at best, last a long time & at worst never come back.

I had an email this week, from the management of the Playhouse theatre where I work as a volunteer usher, enclosing a piece in "The Stage."
https://www.thestage.co.uk/news/coronavirus-oxford-playhouse-prepares-for-redundancies-in-cost-cutting-plan
People who have been furloughed up to now face redundancy. Worse still, the theatre, along with so many others, faces real financial difficulty, which it may not survive. I feel dreadfully sad on so many fronts that I'm not sure I can express it. Obviously firstly for all the people involved in keeping "the show on the road" - (Sorry, couldn't resist that). There are so many that the public don't see, not just the stars & the Front of House people. Wider still is the loss to all our lives, the audiences & the many people who participate in the outreach programmes theatres like the Playhouse offer.

Personally, for me, it's the loss of one of the most enjoyable aspects of the life that I have built for myself here in Oxford. I enjoyed it so much. I have seen productions I would never have otherwise seen & met so many nice people. To quote Anthony Burgess "All human life is here" - Shakespeare too in As You Like It - "All the world's a stage & all men & women are merely actors". It seems to me that we really do need to make every effort to "keep the show on the road" now. We literally can't afford not to.

Then there is NOA Community Centre, which runs on a shoestring & has been closed for the duration. It is a hub for Summertown & the wider Oxford community. The range of courses & activities for all age groups is amazing. Again there is a nucleus of paid staff with a supporting cast of volunteers. I'm not involved with the management any more, so I have no idea what the total loss of income will mean to it's viability into the future. But I do know that it will be difficult to ride this out. Again, for me, it is the loss of one of the main focuses of my life.

Last but definitely not least, I have no idea when, or more importantly if, the swimming pool I use will re-open. It's in a local independent school. They have enough problems providing education in the current situation. I doubt they have given much thought to the Swim Club I & my friends are members of. It isn't just the exercise, vital though that is. It's the friendship group we have. We transferred our monthly coffee mornings to Zoom meetings. So we haven't lost touch, but it isn't the same. My fitness has plumeted, swimming is the only exercise I can do.

 

This Pandemic has hit so many people really hard & it isn't over yet. Everyone has to live with fundamental change & uncertainty. I can cope with that. What I'm not sure I can cope with is the total loss of point to my life that gives me a reason to get up in the morning.

Corona - Consequences

I'm officially fed up with this - 88 days shielding. Out of the house 3 times, once to go to A&E, once to get a blood test & once to walk to my daughters last week.

Cupboards cleared out. The stuff for charity shops put in the car port for people to help themselves because there was so much it blocked the hallway. Old slides & photos digitised & made into family photo books for my daughter & grandsons. Numerous Zooms & Webinars with various charities - I'm extremely well informed about the climate crisis. Also a really interesting one yesterday with Netgear because it's even more important to have good WiFi now. I spend half my day or more on the computer. I discovered that I need a Mesh system. Regular conversations of various sorts with friends, but very few face to face ones. Books read, fiction & non fiction. TV watched - very little live, mostly the stuff I record on the PVR. I still can't watch daytime TV though, it feels too sinful. I have eaten better, because I have cooked virtually everything from scratch. I've even made two cakes.

What I haven't done is any exercise - swimming is the only thing that doesn't cause significant pain. I also haven't done anything creative - I'm really disappointed in myself. With all this time, I really thought I would.

There is no plan, to my day, my week or the months ahead. There is nothing in my diary. I have a holiday booked in September, but I hope they cancel it because I don't want to go on public transport. I can't see how it would be the holiday experience I wanted anyway. My life is lived from minute to minute & hour to hour, day to day & week to week. It does all seem to be going very quickly, which is counter intuitive.

For the first time in my life I am beginning to feel my age. There is no focus. Both my voluntary jobs ceased more than 88 days ago. I couldn't carry on ushering for the Playhouse theatre or being on reception at NOA Community centre because they were such public jobs. I knew from the outset that Covid 19 would be dangerous for me. Swimming almost daily meant going out & walking  through Summertown. I would always meet someone I knew. I now realise just how important actually being in life is. Living is not enough, you need to be a participant.

What matters is the quality of life lived, not just existing. Most people can find things to do, even if it is just cleaning & tidying, but not indefinitely. We are social animals. So even if, like me, you are used to being solitary without feeling lonely, you do need human contact, both physical & emotional.

The thing I'm now realising through experience is that people become conditioned & indoctrinated relatively easily. Who would have thought in March that wearing face masks would be routine? We thought Asians were silly wearing them in Oxford. It puts wearing the niquab into a different context too. I doubt that the psychological effects of Covid 19 will be particularly beneficial.

I am going to have to go out more. Because if I don't I may not be able to return to "normal".

Corona - Freedom?

This weekend marks my 12th week of shielding. 3 months of my life has gone. In all honesty it hasn't been that hard. I've had plenty of contact, both virtual & real, with a lot of friends & with my daughter who has shopped throughout. It isn't what I would have chosen, but I have had lots to do. Indeed too much sometimes.

Yesterday I went out. In theory I'm not supposed to, but I am capable of deciding for myself what risk I think is reasonable. I don't need a politician to do it for me.
Oxfordshire Population: 687,524 – COVID-19 Incidence Rate: 306.8/100,000 inh – COVID-19 Increase: 0.36 new cases per day/100,000 inh -12th June.
It seems to me that at some point we all have to take responsibility for ourselves. We cannot isolate forever. Life has to return to some form of "normal".

I walked to my daughters house 10 minutes away. We all sat in the garden a chatted. Then M & I walked the dog down to the river Cherwell. It was really lovely. I enjoyed every moment & I don't think any of us were at serious risk.

Walking there felt odd. I felt as if I was in an invisible bubble. I was very conscious of everyone around me & at 10am there were quite a lot of people. I found that I was the one who had to move out of everyone's way, going into the middle of the road to avoid breaking the 2m rule. I wasn't nervous, but was in a state of heightened awareness, which was completely novel.

I now realise how unfit I have become. Walking there, walking the dog & walking back, would have tired me prior to Covid 19. I did have a rest sitting in the garden when I arrived though, so it was OK. But I could feel my heart on the way there & on the way back & I was breathless.

I don't yet feel that I would want to go into a shop. But I do think that at some point soon I may have to. My daughter has a demanding job & a family. A lot falls on her shoulders. She cannot continue doing this. Because I haven't had the shielding letter yet, (hopefully my surgery has this in hand now), I haven't been able to get a supermarket delivery slot. Also there is an issue for single people given that we don't need as much food as often as families do. Previously I shopped locally daily & did a big supermarket shop once a month.

The big issue for me is fitness. I can tell that I have deteriorated. Even if my swimming pool opened, I'm not sure how comfortable I would feel returning to swimming. Having to walk home in wet clothes would be uncomfortable.

How will we older people return to some sort of normality? Especially if the vaccine takes as long as it might to get to everyone. But even that is only the answer until the next Pandemic.

Unless we change our relationship with flora & fauna by stopping deforestation, supporting biodiversity, and having better farming methods & food chains, this will keep on happening.

https://ejatlas.org/ - Environmental Justice Atlas

We have brought this on ourselves, but it is possible to do something about it - The window of opportunity is very small though.

 Brazil's Soy boom destroys tropical forest.