Armageddon??

Book of Revelation - "The End Times". Megiddo is an actual place, inhabited since Neolithic times, which is prophesied as the site of a battle at the end of the world.

It is tempting to think that the world is fast approaching it's end. We just can't know exactly when, or what will end. Today there are armed conflicts in too many places to mention here, but it's a frightening list.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_ongoing_armed_conflicts

Action Against Hunger gives the appalling number of countries experiencing famine or extreme hunger. People are dying every day.

https://www.actionagainsthunger.org/the-hunger-crisis/world-hunger-facts/the-worlds-hungriest-countries/ 

The AHA centre has statisitics for natural disasters worldwide now.

https://ahacentre.org/weekly-disaster-update/weekly-disaster-update-9-15-january-2023/

Last but not least we have the overriding problem of the Climate Emergency threatening everything. 

On top of these major world calamities, we in the UK face economic decline, recession, strikes, food banks, serious problems in providing effective healthcare, education & transport, increasing poverty & a glaring, unacceptable, wealth divide. We have politicians who are unable to meet these challenges resulting in a total lack of confidence by the public.

It's a very complex world we live in. Everyone has to work to find solutions. It's everyones problem. It is a battle for survival of the world as we know it. We cannot afford to loose.

Ego, Confidence & Trust

Ego is a person's sense of self-esteem or self-importance. Confidence is the feeling or belief that one can have faith in, or rely on, someone or something, including oneself. To be egotistical is to be excessively conceited or absorbed in oneself; self-centred - "he's selfish, egotistical, and arrogant". Trust is reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something. Basically, trust depends on feelings. It is the belief that we have in someone or something.

All three are interrelated. There is a difficult balance to be achieved if we are to be good human beings. We should not subsume our belief in ourselves to the beliefs of others who may be more dominant. We should have the confidence in our own beliefs to stand up for them, but we have a responsibility to fact check those beliefs.

 

I can remember being bullied in school. I was born in 1945 to a German mother & English father. My christian name is unusual even in Germany. It's meaning is either "beloved of the woods" or "strong". I was tall for a girl, I needed glasses in Primary school, I was clever & worked hard, I played the piano & I had auburn hair. All characteristics which made me different. All led to teasing & bullying. It wasn't easy being me.

But, looking back, I don't remember many specific instances. I've probably blocked most of it out. I don't actually remember much of my childhood. The important thing is that I think it did make me live up to my name. I am mentally strong. I do have confidence in myself. I do trust my instincts. I hope I'm not egotistical though. 

                                                                                

 

No one goes through life without having to deal with s... of some form or other. Some people do seem to have charmed lives. Look on social media & you might believe that many people have everything their hearts desire. I'm very sceptical that is true. I think most people have to deal with varying degrees of hardship & difficulty.

Some have to cope with really dire situations. Look at the headlines in the media today & you will see just how true that is, all over the world. Those people have to trust that others will help them, that they can rely on people. That their governments will do everything necessary to save lives & solve the problems. They have to have confidence that they will survive the trauma. 

We are defined by what we do & don't do. We all have an inner voice. That voice should help us behave well instinctively. Not everyone is trustworthy, but I want to believe that most people are essentially good.

Human Capacity

Not the maximum amount that something can contain, or produce.

I mean mental capacity, the ability to use and understand information to make a decision, and communicate decisions made. We lack capacity if our mind is impaired or disturbed in some way, which means we are unable to make decisions at that time. 

I joke about my increasingly poor memory, saying that it's because I have 78 years of data in my brain, which means there isn't much storage space left. The data is all there somewhere, but retrieval is the problem. My brain is literally it's own "cloud". 

There is also physical capacity, the ability to improve your health, well-being and physical performance, which acts as either an accelerant or drag on that performance. When your physical capacity is strong, you have more endurance and resilience. This too is an increasing problem. Bodies wear out. Simple tasks like getting dressed, turning over in bed, cooking a meal, doing housework, walking, become more difficult.

I am fortunate that I do still have capacity to live my life. It isn't as easy as it was. Certainly not as easy as it was when my husband was alive & there were two of us to share the burdens of modern life. Our skill sets were different & complimented each other. We shared the day to day tasks. We shared conversations and were able to discuss events. Marriage at it's best is a symbiotic relationship.

Loss of human capacity is an increasing problem both for the individual & society with an ageing population - (In 2021 17.66 % of the population in the U K fell into the 0 -14 year category, 63.42 % into the 15 - 64 age group and 18.92 % were over 65 years of age). Especially as we are coming out of a pandemic which has been devastating to mental & physical health. The prevalence of chronic illness, not just due to Covid is a NHS problem. About 15 million people in England have a long-term condition. Long-term conditions or chronic diseases are conditions for which there is currently no cure, and which are managed with drugs and other treatment.

It's a worrying picture. Successive governments have promised to tackle the problem of social care, then kicked it into the long grass or put it in the "too difficult" box. That results in human suffering for both the individuals with capacity loss & their families who are forced to care for them, if they are lucky enough to have families who will do that!

This is an issue that needs political will to sort it out. We should not tolerate forcing children & old people to take on the burden of care. We should all make clear that we are prepared to pay more in tax to provide decent care for the people who need it. Those of us who are lucky enough to be financially secure have to accept that the State can't pay for everything. We must pay our share. Those who are very wealthy should contribute more for those who are poor.

It isn't rocket science. It's what we should expect from a wealthy, "developed" nation.

Politicians

I wouldn't want to be a politician in todays world. There is little that is black & white. The issues are invariably incredibly complex. When I was in my 20's I stood as a Labour candidate in local elections in Ascot - Obviously hope over experience! I have been a liflong liberal socialist though. 

There are two questions that always occur to me;-

• What drives anyone to seek election?
• What does the electorate have the right to expect from Politicians?

I'm not cynical enough to believe that politicians are always driven by money & power. I do believe that many want to change the status quo & improve life for people. They genuinely believe in public service & feel that they have something to contribute. It is true though that quite a lot of politicians don't behave as we expect. Worse, quite a lot of ministers fall below the standards demanded. This goes from "disorderly conduct", through independent complaints, to breaching the Code of Standards & at the top treason or sedition. It's all about "acts" or "omissions" prejudicing the state or political system. 

Currently Nadim Zahawi has been sacked because of his tax situation. The worst thing about this to my mind is that he didn't think that his tax situation was relevant to holding high public office. He lied about it when it became public. He did not resign, he had to be sacked following an enquiry. Finally he did not feel his conduct required an apology. It all seems unbelievably duplicitous & arrogant. I expect more from people in high office.

Politicians are just as likely as you or I to make mistakes. That isn't necessarily sackable so long as they are truthful. We should accept their human fallibility. I doubt any of us could do their job without making mistakes, however good their advisors are. They should be held accountable for their actions & lack of action though, especially those in high office. 

It's bad enough that they are trained to avoid answering difficult questions. To prevaricate & stick to a pre determined script which often bears no relevance to the question asked. It's a skill they learn. Personally I think it shows a contempt for the people they supposedly serve.

 

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2016/oct/28/never-give-a-straight-answer-zoe-williams-learns-to-talk-like-a-politician

Being a good politician must be stressful & difficult. All I want from politicians is that they tell the truth unless that would cause serious harm & that they comply with reasonable standards of behaviour. There should be evidence of a moral compass. 

Unfortunately I simply don't think much of that applies to this UK government.

  

Disagreement & Conflict

Apparently there are five main causes of conflict;-

• Information conflicts - people have different or insufficient information, or disagree over what is relevant.

• Values conflicts - people have perceived or actual incompatible belief systems. A person or group tries to impose its values on others or claims exclusive right to a set of values or a way forward. 

• Interest conflicts -  competition over perceived or actual incompatible needs.

• Relationship conflicts -  caused by misperceptions, strong negative emotions, or poor communication. One person may distrust the other and believe that the other person’s actions are motivated by malice or an intent to harm the other.

• Structural conflicts - caused by oppressive behaviors exerted on others.

In order to resolve conflict there needs to be a respectful environment. Values may be non-negotiable, but they can & should be be discussed. People need to be able to live peacefully and coherently alongside each other. A real barrier to resolution & accommodation is belief that in order to satisfy ones own needs, those of the opponent must be sacrificed. Resolution can occur if each person has the opportunity to talk through the issues and respond to the other person’s concerns. If there is no dialogue this isn't possible. There needs to be "give & take" on both sides. One persons view & values should not dominate.

I have been a Magistrate & a member of the Independent Monitoring Board of a prison, so have a diverse experience of the Law & Justice. I have also been a Mediator, trained by the Quakers, which gave me experience of how difficult it can be to resolve disagreements & conflicts. 

In all that experience I have often been surprised at human behaviour & the outcomes of that behaviour. According to a Harvard study men are generally more aggressive & combative than women. Men are, on average, more outwardly aggressive than women. Women can be as angry, but are better able to control immediate impulsive responses to anger.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/may/12/science-of-anger-gender-age-personality

There has always been conflict. I doubt that will change in what is left of my life. Conflict & anger is damaging to everyone involved. It has physical & emotional repercussions. There are ways to resolve conflict;-

• Mediation - parties communicate with a neutral third party who makes a non-binding recommendation 
• Arbitration - parties commit to conform to the third party recommendation 
• Negotiation - parties engage in face-to-face talk. 

The difficulty is that everyone involved in the disagreement or conflict has to genuinely want to resolve the issue & reach a conclusion acceptable to all. No solution is possible without a genuine acceptance of differing points of view. 

Sadly, all too often one party is unable to "give an inch". In extremis wars result. 

 

 

Birthdays - 78 Years

I've always felt ambivalent about my birthday. I'm not sure what there is to celebrate about surviving another year. Also January isn't a particularly good time of year to have a celebration. At least the sky is blue & it isn't raining or bitterly cold today. I'm actually having a birthday weekend, because I had a lovely morning yesterday at an exhibition at the Ashmolean with my daughter & lunch afterwards. I'll have a birthday tea with my small family this afternoon. Very low key, but just right.

However, as I get older I'm more complacent about ageing. It doesn't seem to mean much after 78 years & there are benefits. The highs & lows of life seem to even out & experience shows you that you can & do deal with most things. There isn't much choice. You do have to accept that you are walking a path that is getting shorter.

The really good thing is that 78 years of experience means that I know a lot more about life & how to deal with it. I also think that I have learned to accept more & try not to be judgemental. There is a certain freedom in understanding that change is inevitable & normal & you can't control everything in life. 

I'm trying to accept people for what they are, warts & all. I've accepted that I can't & shouldn't try to change other people, only myself. That doesn't mean I accept poor behaviour, but it does mean I really appreciate my good friends & family. 

I do believe that life should be a path towards being the best person you can be. Perfection is not possible. We are all a "work in progress". We all have faults, but we all have choice & the intelligence to choose wisely. All we can hope for is to improve gradually. 

No one knows when their life will end. I think what I'm aiming for now is to "do no harm". Especially regarding the wonderful world we have been given to live in.

"Spare" - Harry's Memoir

This outpouring was actually written by JR Moehringer, a prolific ghostwriter of celebrity memoirs. Harry got $25m from Penguin for the rights to "Spare". It's the culmination of a series of sadly ill advised, but eye wateringly money generating, publicity moves by the Sussexes, following on from their abdication from Royal duties. The Oprah Winfrey interview in 2021, for which Meghan was allegedly paid between $7-9 million, was the embarrassing beginning. There followed a $100m deal with Netflix for a string of programmes, including their recent six-part docu-series, plus a $30m deal with Spotify for a podcast hosted by Meghan.

There has been a drip drip cumulative effect of the revelations - cleverly timed so they do not clash. It's very savvy PR to maximise income & exposure, keeping  the Sussexes at the top of the media & news for as long as possible. I'm sure Meghan's celebrity status meant that she had plenty of contacts to call on to master mind this whole sad fiasco. 

Before he left London, the Duke of Sussex was worth somewhere between $25 and $40 million, according to Celebrity net worth. But now, he and his wife have a combined net worth of a reported $60 million. So it's difficult not to see this public washing of "dirty linen" as simply a money making exercise.

It is hard to comprehend the logic & rationale behind all this given everything Harry has said about Press & Media privacy and intrusion in his mothers life & his. Or is the intrusion only acceptable if he is getting paid a lot of money? 

What else do the Sussexes, particularly Harry, have to say apart from the fact that they are angry with the royal family? Don't all families have arguments? Aren't we all p..... off with members of our immediate family at times. I can remember being really angry with my parents. I was an only child so wasn't a "spare", but trust me that has it's own problems. 

However hurt, upset or angry I was I would not have dreamt of doing what Harry has done to his family. Not that anyone would have been particularly interested because I had no status or celebrity. I cannot begin to imagine what the four members of Harry's immediate family are feeling. What he has done is deeply hurtful, unforgivable, childish, self absorbed & needy.

We all have s... in our lives & we have to learn from it & deal with it. For Harry to think that what he has done leaves much room for reconcilliation or "getting his brother & father back" seems frankly deluded.  Both Sussexes seem intent on dwelling on the past.

I'm also sceptical about the Sussexes launching themselves as global philanthropists. The Archewell Foundation includes the couple's "nonprofit" charitable foundation, as well as business divisions focusing on media production, Archewell Audio and Archewell Productions. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archewell  This followed from their Sussex Royal "brand" which ended because they were no longer Royal. I think they really have to decide what they are - A List celebrities or Ex Royals. If they are serious about Philanthropy they need to be credible to the millions of people who don't have their money or position, but do live with poverty, hunger, deprivation of basic needs, discrimination & war.

All of this is really sad. Harry & Meghan have alienated an awful lot of people by what they have done. I don't know if the stories of his PTSD & the controversial EMDR treatment is true. I wouldn't wish mental ill health on anyone, but it does seem to be a possible explanation for his otherwise surprising behaviour. 

PS

I've now watched most of the Bradby interview. The thing that stands out is how really good he is at the whole Media thing. He has obviously been schooled by someone who knows a lot about presentation & PR. The other thing is that he simply scatter guns accusations without a shred of evidence to back them up. It's all his "perception" of what occurred & we all know how unreliable memory is. Especially if it's someone who has suffered trauma from an early age. What he doesn't seem to comprehend is that he isn't doing himself any favours by revealing all. He acknowledges all the things that make him an unreliable witness - his mothers death (PTSD?), being a member of a uniquely dysfunctional Royal family, drinking to excess, taking class A drugs, fighting in a war (PTSD?), needing psychiatric help.....None of it makes him very balanced or a reliable source. But that is what he wants us to believe he is.

He has also led a very privileged & entitled life which bears little or no resemblance to that of most people. It seems to have made him quite self absorbed & gives him unrealistic expectations about people's behaviour. It's beyond belief that he really thinks that what he has done can lead to reconciliation. It's all very unedifying & sad.

I would like to have seen him be challenged by Bradby. I imagine that the Press & media will now come up with as much evidence as possible to counteract the accusations. So the Royals may well come out of this far better than Harry. I think he has "shot himself in the foot".