Reflections

I look at my face in the mirror every morning when I wash & brush my teeth. The face I see reflected is reality, but my mind still believes otherwise. I know that I am wrinkled, my skin is paper thin & dry, my hair has lost it's auburn colour & I have eyebrows which grow out of control. I understand that I am an old lady, but my mind is still working, still interested & curious. Fundamentally I am myself as I have always been, but better - I hope. I know more, through experience & living. Also from reading, watching documentaries & research generally.

Because I am more sedentary due to the limitations of my body, I do think more. This blog has changed over 15 years, starting in February 2011, with a current total of  1,219 posts. Obviously I am very opinionated! It started because I missed discussing life, philosophy & politics with my husband & needed to find a way forward on my own after a lifetime of marriage. Now I'm amazed to see that my blog has reached as many as 15.5 thousand people in one week.

I have changed & the blog has changed. I could not have foreseen how my life, the UK & the world would change. I was concerned about climate change & politics at the start, but both of those issues have become even more concerning. Plus we now have wars, death & destruction to contend with. 

I have just been recommended to read "The Beginning Comes After the End" by Rebecca Solnit, who also wrote "Hope in the Dark". I will read both, but I am losing faith. I have always been a glass half full person, thinking that if I believed I could do something, I could. Belief is really important. Now I am deeply concerned. I feel we have made society too complex, we have damaged too much, we endlessly fight over territory & resources, we make decisions without considering consequences...

I reflect & I despair of the human race. I cannot imagine what my 21 year old twin grandsons will inherit. Or rather I don't want to, because it is too dire. I never thought I would think like this & I'm glad I'm 81 with limited time left. 

When I look at some of the comments on Greenpeace or ClientEarth posts on Facebook I am speechless at the complacency & ignorance. We do have the capacity to turn this around, to make meaningful change, but it is an uphill struggle. In order to do that everyone everywhere has to buy into a different way of living & sharing this planet. 

 

Unfortunately I just think we are now over the tipping point & the forces against us are too wealthy & too powerful. Self interest is prevalent both in multinational companies & individuals. We have lost our sense of real community. We are insular & self serving. Many people feel they have no agency, no power or control. I even question if we can call ourselves democratic. 

 

We all need to reflect before it is too late. We all need to change fundamentally or we will destroy the wonderful world that we have. I am not Cassandra - She accurately predicted future disasters or negative events but was ignored or disbelieved, but I can see the direction we are going in.

 

 

 

I hope it isn't too late.