We are surrounded by the written word. Being able to read is a necessity. Yet 1 in 10 people have dyslexia & 1 in 6 adults only have the reading skills of an 11 year old.
http://www.dyslexiaaction.org.uk/page/facts-and-figures-about-dyslexia-0
According to the National Literacy Trust 2012 survey - www.literacytrust.org.uk/assets/.../Literacy_State_of_the_Nation_-_2_Aug_2011.pdf - One in five parents easily find the opportunity to read to their children, with the rest struggling due to fatigue and busy lifestyles. Of the parents that read to the children, 67% are mothers compared to just 17% of fathers. 1 in 5 mums and dads may not be able to read confidently with their children.
Illiteracy levels in Prisons are very high & widespread throughout our jails.
https://ioelondonblog.wordpress.com/2015/07/16/prisoner-literacy-levels-a-worrying-lack-of-statistics/
http://www.prisonerseducation.org.uk/media-press/new-government-data-on-english-and-maths-skills-of-prisoners
"In the first set of comparable figures for over a decade,
the government has published data revealing that 46% of people entering
the prison system have literacy skills no higher than those broadly
expected of an 11 year old child. This is three times more than the 15%
of people with similar skills levels in the adult population generally.
52% of those assessed have the equivalent capability in numeracy which
compares with 49% of the general public. The statistics also show that 46% of newly assessed prisoners have
Level 1 and Level 2 literacy skills, (GCSE equivalent) which compares to
85% of the general population"
Reading opens the window on both fiction & non fiction - On
history, the world we live in, other cultures......etc etc. Whether we
read books, comics, newspapers, maps, Kindles, computer screens -
whatever, a world of knowledge & understanding is lost to anyone who
cannot read well.
Books are now cheaper than they have
ever been & bookshops are well laid out & inviting with very
knowledgable staff. But even if you don't have the money to buy books
our wonderful libraries will order any book for you for a very small fee
& provide a stimulating & quiet environment to read if you
don't have that at home. The fact that many libraries are now run by
volunteers shows how undervalued they are by the government &
conversely how much the public do value them. http://www.publiclibrariesnews.com/about-public-libraries-news/list-of-uk-volunteer-run-libraries
I owe a lifelong debt to libraries.
Our challenge as a nation is to recognise the problem with poor readers
& to effectively utilise the skills and knowledge, which are
available, to help both adults and children who have reading
difficulties. It is in our interest as a nation & in the interest of
poor readers themselves to open the doors of opportunity to them
through reading.
We need to create a home & wider
environment where there is no stigma attached to reading difficulties
& where everyone supports & encourages poor readers to get full
enjoyment from the written word. It's a simple aim, & should be a
right, but we are a long way off from fulfilling it.
Wednesday, 25 May 2016
Monday, 23 May 2016
Rudeness & technology
Are we becoming a less polite society? Are we more inconsiderate? Do we ignore other people & their needs. Does technology actually pollute our environment? I could go on.
The pinpricks of constant irritation with other peoples' use of technology in public really does get to me. Mobile phones can be set to silent, but my guess is that few people do that. So we are subject to a constant background of annoying ringtones & texting tones. Then there is the common assumption that the person at the other end of the phone has a hearing impediment. Or do people really think that the public is interested in the minutii of their boring lives? No one seems to consider not making the call or letting it go to voicemail and responding at a more appropriate time.
I am a volunteer usher in a local theatre. People are generally quite good during performances, we have a select class of audience in Oxford. But I am amazed just how many are locked into their phones before, during intervals & immediately after. The bright phone lights can be just as disturbing as the sounds. There seems to be an unhealthy compulsion to be connected to the world but not to actual people. Most people go with someone else, but really sometimes one wonders why.
The same is true in restaurants. Surely the whole point of enjoying a meal out is to have a conversation with your companion & share good food? Yet, how many times do people say -"Oh I must take this". Really? Can't it wait? Aren't you saying, in effect, "this person on my phone is much more important than you - my companion".
Most of the above & more apply to tablets & laptops. I can understand that people work on trains, but keyboard tapping can be quite irritating. A train or a bus isn't an office. It isn't your own personal space. Are people being paid to work while they commute? I don't think so. They are just driven and overworked. Or, too incompetent to get their work done in office hours.
Bottom line - In my book it's an addiction & a very rude & inconsiderate one at that. And I haven't even started on people who play games & watch films etc.
Bring back the days when we weren't instantly accessible to anyone. When we didn't work or communicate every moment of our waking day. When we were able to cope with being alone & incommunicado. When we had work time, play time, meal times & time to ourselves. When we didn't feel the need to be constantly occupied.
I fear it's too late. We are doomed to every increasing technology. Soon we won't need the phone or the computer. It will be implanted subcutaneously & we will all be bionic machines.
I wonder if we need to disconnect to really connect.
The pinpricks of constant irritation with other peoples' use of technology in public really does get to me. Mobile phones can be set to silent, but my guess is that few people do that. So we are subject to a constant background of annoying ringtones & texting tones. Then there is the common assumption that the person at the other end of the phone has a hearing impediment. Or do people really think that the public is interested in the minutii of their boring lives? No one seems to consider not making the call or letting it go to voicemail and responding at a more appropriate time.
I am a volunteer usher in a local theatre. People are generally quite good during performances, we have a select class of audience in Oxford. But I am amazed just how many are locked into their phones before, during intervals & immediately after. The bright phone lights can be just as disturbing as the sounds. There seems to be an unhealthy compulsion to be connected to the world but not to actual people. Most people go with someone else, but really sometimes one wonders why.
The same is true in restaurants. Surely the whole point of enjoying a meal out is to have a conversation with your companion & share good food? Yet, how many times do people say -"Oh I must take this". Really? Can't it wait? Aren't you saying, in effect, "this person on my phone is much more important than you - my companion".
Most of the above & more apply to tablets & laptops. I can understand that people work on trains, but keyboard tapping can be quite irritating. A train or a bus isn't an office. It isn't your own personal space. Are people being paid to work while they commute? I don't think so. They are just driven and overworked. Or, too incompetent to get their work done in office hours.
Bottom line - In my book it's an addiction & a very rude & inconsiderate one at that. And I haven't even started on people who play games & watch films etc.
Bring back the days when we weren't instantly accessible to anyone. When we didn't work or communicate every moment of our waking day. When we were able to cope with being alone & incommunicado. When we had work time, play time, meal times & time to ourselves. When we didn't feel the need to be constantly occupied.
I fear it's too late. We are doomed to every increasing technology. Soon we won't need the phone or the computer. It will be implanted subcutaneously & we will all be bionic machines.
I wonder if we need to disconnect to really connect.
Sunday, 22 May 2016
Toilet Paper
I can measure my life in loo paper! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilet_paper
I think I can actually remember tearing newspaper up into squares. That must be the ultimate in re-cycling. Then there was the dreadful Izal hard tissue paper squares, which were useless. Soft toilet paper was such an improvement. Now we have quilted toilet paper, which seemed over the top but has become the norm. The latest is special wet wipes, which seems a bit over the top & some can't be flushed.
When I think about it our use of paper has increased exponentially. We have kitchen roll instead of cloths, babies have disposable nappies instead of towelling. We use tissues instead of hankies, paper napkins instead of linen.
All of this uses finite natural resources - trees. At least some big multinational companies have some sort of replacement tree planting programme. It also creates a huge amount of waste to be disposed of in landfill. At least most papers will bio-degrade.
Change & improvement are normal. Nothing stays the same. As a woman I'm pleased that we no longer have to wash & iron cloths, hankies & napkins. Life today is literally too short & hectic. We just have to keep in mind the possible future consequences of our actions & decisions.
I think I can actually remember tearing newspaper up into squares. That must be the ultimate in re-cycling. Then there was the dreadful Izal hard tissue paper squares, which were useless. Soft toilet paper was such an improvement. Now we have quilted toilet paper, which seemed over the top but has become the norm. The latest is special wet wipes, which seems a bit over the top & some can't be flushed.
When I think about it our use of paper has increased exponentially. We have kitchen roll instead of cloths, babies have disposable nappies instead of towelling. We use tissues instead of hankies, paper napkins instead of linen.
All of this uses finite natural resources - trees. At least some big multinational companies have some sort of replacement tree planting programme. It also creates a huge amount of waste to be disposed of in landfill. At least most papers will bio-degrade.
Change & improvement are normal. Nothing stays the same. As a woman I'm pleased that we no longer have to wash & iron cloths, hankies & napkins. Life today is literally too short & hectic. We just have to keep in mind the possible future consequences of our actions & decisions.
Saturday, 21 May 2016
Warner Hotel Mini Breaks - Ageism, Snobbishness & Intolerance.
I just got back from my second Warner Hotel mini break. (See the Blog about the first one - 9.5 2015 in Holidays). Obviously they do their thing well or I wouldn't have gone back. This time was different because I knew exactly what to expect - The formula doesn't vary at all.
I did find myself reflecting more, both on the clientele & my own attitudes. I realise that I don't "do" old people well. I'm not patient & tolerant even though I am now officially old. I don't feel part of the group. I am irritated by ditherers, repetitive conversations & people who want to tell me everything about their own lives without being interested in mine. Old people are not necessarily nice. They can be very self absorbed & rude. So my conclusion must be that I am ageist.
I also realise that I'm not a "joiner in". I don't do communal waving of arms to tunes for example or forced hilarity. I really don't like being told what my response to something should be. There is something about the coach party mentality that I really don't get. Conclusion - I've become a Southern snob.
On the other hand you have to admire people who obviously enjoy themselves. Who are prepared to get up in front of a big audience & dance for instance. I loved dancing when I was younger & was good at it. Years with a non dancing husband & now a body that won't do what I want have made me less confident. I simply couldn't get up on a dance floor, although I was asked, because I know it will cause me pain & embarrassment.
I think the problem is all mine. If I dance I want to enjoy it as I did when I was young. I want that enjoyment to show in my facial expression & how my body moves in time to the music. I want the inner me, who hasn't changed, to show. So I find the mostly stilted, mechanical, unsmiling dancers with little rhythm a sad shadow of what they probably used to be.
I'm sure I'm the one who is wrong. Warners has a very good U S P which meets the needs of an every increasing, enormous number of people & gives them great pleasure. Their staff are really good at their jobs, often multi-tasking.
Oldies Rule! - & Warners know that & cater for it.
I did find myself reflecting more, both on the clientele & my own attitudes. I realise that I don't "do" old people well. I'm not patient & tolerant even though I am now officially old. I don't feel part of the group. I am irritated by ditherers, repetitive conversations & people who want to tell me everything about their own lives without being interested in mine. Old people are not necessarily nice. They can be very self absorbed & rude. So my conclusion must be that I am ageist.
I also realise that I'm not a "joiner in". I don't do communal waving of arms to tunes for example or forced hilarity. I really don't like being told what my response to something should be. There is something about the coach party mentality that I really don't get. Conclusion - I've become a Southern snob.
On the other hand you have to admire people who obviously enjoy themselves. Who are prepared to get up in front of a big audience & dance for instance. I loved dancing when I was younger & was good at it. Years with a non dancing husband & now a body that won't do what I want have made me less confident. I simply couldn't get up on a dance floor, although I was asked, because I know it will cause me pain & embarrassment.
I think the problem is all mine. If I dance I want to enjoy it as I did when I was young. I want that enjoyment to show in my facial expression & how my body moves in time to the music. I want the inner me, who hasn't changed, to show. So I find the mostly stilted, mechanical, unsmiling dancers with little rhythm a sad shadow of what they probably used to be.
I'm sure I'm the one who is wrong. Warners has a very good U S P which meets the needs of an every increasing, enormous number of people & gives them great pleasure. Their staff are really good at their jobs, often multi-tasking.
Oldies Rule! - & Warners know that & cater for it.
Thursday, 12 May 2016
Displacement Activity & Procrastination
I have got a very well equipped "Arty Farty" room. My Main at college was Art / Textiles. When I was at home as a young mother in Ascot I exhibited my work & actually sold some & had commissions for special pieces. All through my life I have been creative in fits & starts.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creativity
Unfortunately I let my organised, competetive, work oriented, self take over from my free thinking, experimental, creative self, (which apparently isn't to do with Left / Right brain thinking as I thought).
http://www.livescience.com/39373-left-brain-right-brain-myth.html
Whatever causes the conflict I have allowed myself to be distracted from creativity in the artistic sense for years.
I have now spent a couple of days in my Arty Farty room with a view to taking myself in hand. Nothing in the least creative has emerged. I have made a list of themes I want to explore. I have gone through my extensive library of art books & a pile is waiting for the charity shop. I'm looking through my collection of source material acquired over years. I'm also looking at all the artists materials I own.
I will be ruthless. I will not be confused by too much. Less is more. I will get round to actually making something creative. Soon. Maybe.
PS
The room is finished & ready. There's no excuse. I'm about to go away for a mini break, so when I get back there will be time. There won't be any excuse for procrastination. It's all in the mind. Why is it so hard?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creativity
Unfortunately I let my organised, competetive, work oriented, self take over from my free thinking, experimental, creative self, (which apparently isn't to do with Left / Right brain thinking as I thought).
http://www.livescience.com/39373-left-brain-right-brain-myth.html
Whatever causes the conflict I have allowed myself to be distracted from creativity in the artistic sense for years.
I have now spent a couple of days in my Arty Farty room with a view to taking myself in hand. Nothing in the least creative has emerged. I have made a list of themes I want to explore. I have gone through my extensive library of art books & a pile is waiting for the charity shop. I'm looking through my collection of source material acquired over years. I'm also looking at all the artists materials I own.
I will be ruthless. I will not be confused by too much. Less is more. I will get round to actually making something creative. Soon. Maybe.
PS
The room is finished & ready. There's no excuse. I'm about to go away for a mini break, so when I get back there will be time. There won't be any excuse for procrastination. It's all in the mind. Why is it so hard?
Tuesday, 10 May 2016
The Rhythm of Life - 2
I don't remember much music at all when I was a child. At home there was only the radio. Looking back the programming was extremely limited & very unsophisticated. In the UK - Billy Cotton's Bandshow, Edmundo Ross, Jimmy Young, Tommy Steele, Lonnie Donegan. In America - Doris Day, Frankie Laine, Johnny Ray.
Rock & Roll emerged from America in the latter 50's with Elvis & a host of solo singers & groups. The influence of "Black" music, the Blues & Jazz fascinated me. I particularly loved the Blues & the syncopated dance moves of black groups.
Because I played the piano I also loved Classical music & eventually got a record player. I started buying 45's & LP's. Not many because I didn't have any money & it was a frivolity which my parents probably couldn't afford.
When I went to Grammar school I was influenced by the musical tastes of other girls. Some friends were very keen on Ella Fitzgerald, Johnny Dankworth & Cleo Laine. We also had musical appreciation classes & learned to listen properly to music. I began to understand that it wasn't just background noise or something to jive to at the Catholic Youth Club. (Fortunately you didn't have to be a Catholic, because it was the only place to go). I was also influenced by a lodger we had who loved American Swing bands like Glen Miller.
By the time I went to college in the early 60's, ( a degree equivalent Art, Music & Drama college affiliated to London University), a world of music was opening up. Although my "main" was Art, I did Art of Movement Laban Dance, which was a whole new world, as well as continuing with the piano.
I remember seeing both "Hair" in the late 60's & "Jesus Christ Superstar" in the 70's. Both were stunning experiences, visually & musically. The world was changing & music said something about our world. It transported you out of your life.
My working life was filled with music. I was an infant teacher & singing & playing instruments was intrinsic to the education of small children. When I got a scale post for music in a junior school I taught the whole age range & concerts & performances were a joy. Playing hymns for assembly wasn't quite so much fun.
Eventually, having to drive to a headship in a city every day, playing cassette tapes got me through the commute. Everything from opera & choral works to pop & jazz.
I now have very eclectic musical tastes & I have grown to love everything from Adele to Opera. I can't just have music as a background though. I have to listen to it. I like to be surrounded by it & don't like wearing earphones & a MP3 player.
Music is very important to every culture. It speaks to something very deep in our souls. I'm sure it is vital to our development as human beings & think that music has the power to radically change personality & mood. Maybe dictators just haven't been exposed to enough music.
Rock & Roll emerged from America in the latter 50's with Elvis & a host of solo singers & groups. The influence of "Black" music, the Blues & Jazz fascinated me. I particularly loved the Blues & the syncopated dance moves of black groups.
Because I played the piano I also loved Classical music & eventually got a record player. I started buying 45's & LP's. Not many because I didn't have any money & it was a frivolity which my parents probably couldn't afford.
When I went to Grammar school I was influenced by the musical tastes of other girls. Some friends were very keen on Ella Fitzgerald, Johnny Dankworth & Cleo Laine. We also had musical appreciation classes & learned to listen properly to music. I began to understand that it wasn't just background noise or something to jive to at the Catholic Youth Club. (Fortunately you didn't have to be a Catholic, because it was the only place to go). I was also influenced by a lodger we had who loved American Swing bands like Glen Miller.
By the time I went to college in the early 60's, ( a degree equivalent Art, Music & Drama college affiliated to London University), a world of music was opening up. Although my "main" was Art, I did Art of Movement Laban Dance, which was a whole new world, as well as continuing with the piano.
I remember seeing both "Hair" in the late 60's & "Jesus Christ Superstar" in the 70's. Both were stunning experiences, visually & musically. The world was changing & music said something about our world. It transported you out of your life.
My working life was filled with music. I was an infant teacher & singing & playing instruments was intrinsic to the education of small children. When I got a scale post for music in a junior school I taught the whole age range & concerts & performances were a joy. Playing hymns for assembly wasn't quite so much fun.
Eventually, having to drive to a headship in a city every day, playing cassette tapes got me through the commute. Everything from opera & choral works to pop & jazz.
I now have very eclectic musical tastes & I have grown to love everything from Adele to Opera. I can't just have music as a background though. I have to listen to it. I like to be surrounded by it & don't like wearing earphones & a MP3 player.
Music is very important to every culture. It speaks to something very deep in our souls. I'm sure it is vital to our development as human beings & think that music has the power to radically change personality & mood. Maybe dictators just haven't been exposed to enough music.
Monday, 9 May 2016
The Rhythm of Life
I can't settle without a "project" to organise. I don't seem to be very good at just living from day to day. Obviously there are daily routines - get up, breakfast, dress, wash up, make the bed, coffee. That takes me to about 9am. Then the day stretches ahead, broken up by a more or less daily swim, lunch & supper. After supper I only have the energy to watch TV, usually things I have selected to record. I waste far too much time on my computer too.
The thing is I was always very creative. I have a designated "Arty Farty" room, but I don't seem to be able to even start doing anything. There is more to creativity than you might think. I have never just made something. There have always been stages - inspiration, thinking, looking for sources, designing, selecting materials, chosing colour.....Why, after years of working & not having any time, can I not lose myself in creating something when the one commodity I do have is time? I don't get it.
I have always had at least 2 books on the go at all times. I used to long for the time to be able to read a daily newspaper. Now I can only read at bedtime. If I try to read during the day I fall asleep. It somehow feels wrong to read a novel during the day & I certainly don't want to sleep any more.
When I worked I was a wife & a mother. I did all my own housework, cooked every meal from scratch, had a very busy social life as well as a demanding job. Now I have plenty of time I have a cleaner & I eat more M&S cook chill than in the whole of the rest of my previous life. I rarely entertain, (because I don't have the energy to do everything on my own).
Is this just ageing? I have no idea, but it does annoy me. The young have no time. The old have more than they know what to do with. I want to do something enjoyable & / or useful with mine, but I'm like the rabbit that doesn't have the Duracell battery. I can feel my energy ebbing away. I need to get a grip!
The thing is I was always very creative. I have a designated "Arty Farty" room, but I don't seem to be able to even start doing anything. There is more to creativity than you might think. I have never just made something. There have always been stages - inspiration, thinking, looking for sources, designing, selecting materials, chosing colour.....Why, after years of working & not having any time, can I not lose myself in creating something when the one commodity I do have is time? I don't get it.
I have always had at least 2 books on the go at all times. I used to long for the time to be able to read a daily newspaper. Now I can only read at bedtime. If I try to read during the day I fall asleep. It somehow feels wrong to read a novel during the day & I certainly don't want to sleep any more.
When I worked I was a wife & a mother. I did all my own housework, cooked every meal from scratch, had a very busy social life as well as a demanding job. Now I have plenty of time I have a cleaner & I eat more M&S cook chill than in the whole of the rest of my previous life. I rarely entertain, (because I don't have the energy to do everything on my own).
Is this just ageing? I have no idea, but it does annoy me. The young have no time. The old have more than they know what to do with. I want to do something enjoyable & / or useful with mine, but I'm like the rabbit that doesn't have the Duracell battery. I can feel my energy ebbing away. I need to get a grip!
Thursday, 5 May 2016
Life - It is what it is.
In my youth & innocence I thought that this attitude was fatalistic & kept millions of religious people subjugated in dire conditions & poverty. In a way that is true, but I now realise that there is another way of looking at it. Whatever is happening in your life now, this minute, is a reality. You can't change it. It has already happened.
My young self was invincible. I could achieve anything I put my mind to. To some extent that was true, I did manage to achieve most of my goals by determination & hard work. There was a cost to not failing though. To me & to others. I now realise that I'm not sure what failure is.
Age makes us more accepting & frees us from a lot of things.
I know myself, my virtues & flaws. I accept the existance of good & evil in the world. I realise that there is much that I cannot control. I actually understand the value of difference. I realise that I am completely inconsequential, but do have an effect on others.
I don't feel I have to conform to social mores or belong to a tribe. I don't feel I have to do what someone else wants me to do - I would break the law in certain circumstances. I'm not afraid to voice my opinion, although I would try not to offend or hurt others. I'm not afraid of death, only the manner of dying. I've had an interesting life & am living the final chapter.
Now is important. We can't know the moment of our last breath. Whatever the circumstances of my life in this moment it will never come again so I should really live it. Sadly that includes a lot of wasted time & effort - watching too much TV for instance. Being distracted by unimportant tasks.
Overall my aim is to be as good as I can be. Life is a journey. What matters is the baggage you carry, the path you choose & how you interact with the people you meet & the circumstances you experience.
It's bloody hard to get it right - but maybe that's the point.
My young self was invincible. I could achieve anything I put my mind to. To some extent that was true, I did manage to achieve most of my goals by determination & hard work. There was a cost to not failing though. To me & to others. I now realise that I'm not sure what failure is.
Age makes us more accepting & frees us from a lot of things.
I know myself, my virtues & flaws. I accept the existance of good & evil in the world. I realise that there is much that I cannot control. I actually understand the value of difference. I realise that I am completely inconsequential, but do have an effect on others.
I don't feel I have to conform to social mores or belong to a tribe. I don't feel I have to do what someone else wants me to do - I would break the law in certain circumstances. I'm not afraid to voice my opinion, although I would try not to offend or hurt others. I'm not afraid of death, only the manner of dying. I've had an interesting life & am living the final chapter.
Now is important. We can't know the moment of our last breath. Whatever the circumstances of my life in this moment it will never come again so I should really live it. Sadly that includes a lot of wasted time & effort - watching too much TV for instance. Being distracted by unimportant tasks.
Overall my aim is to be as good as I can be. Life is a journey. What matters is the baggage you carry, the path you choose & how you interact with the people you meet & the circumstances you experience.
It's bloody hard to get it right - but maybe that's the point.
Monday, 2 May 2016
Loneliness & Being Alone.
This was one of the first things I blogged about after being widowed, when I decided to Blog as a coping mechanism. The following link summed up what I learned.
https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=5068302536110183813#editor/target=post;postID=2811342474394407359;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=88;src=postname.
Now, 7 years later, it still holds true.
In a typical day I probably don't have extended conversations with anyone. If I have a chest infection I often don't know if I can speak unless I talk to myself, which I try not to do. Unless I go swimming or to the shops for food I don't meet anyone. Conversely, I have lived in an urban area for 3 years now so I do meet acquaintances & neighbours more than I did living in rural Gloucestershire.
I think you get habituated to your life, whatever it is. You develop coping mechanisms to deal with being alone. You become accepting of things you cannot change. You try to find pleasure in different things than when you were part of a couple. You attempt to put your situation in some sort of context - better than many - worse than some. You recognise that life is a gift & try to be positive.
But for some this simply isn't possible, because of ill health or depression for example. If you are alone and lonely it is very difficult, even impossible, to maintain a "glass half full" disposition. Our minds are powerful tools for good and ill. The mind / body link is at the root of much of the Dis Ease of modern life. We have an epidemic of isolation & loneliness in all age groups & strata of society. It isn't just the elderly & infirm who live solitary lives.
I go to the theatre, to the cinema, to exhibitions, I watch TV, but I miss the sharing of opinions & discussion. I know what I think, but everyone needs to have their opinions modified & enriched by someone else's.
People need people. We are social animals. We need communication & physical contact. Technology is my lifeline to the world. I'm lost without it. I Blog, I Email, I research, I text, I phone. It's better than a void of nothing, but none of that is the same as really sharing my life with someone else. It's nothing to do with sex or even love. It's to do with companionship.
Those who have it are very blessed.
Those who have empathetic friends who make the effort are blessed too.
This song by Ralph Mc Tell says it all beautifully.
http://www.cowboylyrics.com/lyrics/mctell-ralph/streets-of-london-11076.html
https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=5068302536110183813#editor/target=post;postID=2811342474394407359;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=88;src=postname.
Now, 7 years later, it still holds true.
In a typical day I probably don't have extended conversations with anyone. If I have a chest infection I often don't know if I can speak unless I talk to myself, which I try not to do. Unless I go swimming or to the shops for food I don't meet anyone. Conversely, I have lived in an urban area for 3 years now so I do meet acquaintances & neighbours more than I did living in rural Gloucestershire.
I think you get habituated to your life, whatever it is. You develop coping mechanisms to deal with being alone. You become accepting of things you cannot change. You try to find pleasure in different things than when you were part of a couple. You attempt to put your situation in some sort of context - better than many - worse than some. You recognise that life is a gift & try to be positive.
But for some this simply isn't possible, because of ill health or depression for example. If you are alone and lonely it is very difficult, even impossible, to maintain a "glass half full" disposition. Our minds are powerful tools for good and ill. The mind / body link is at the root of much of the Dis Ease of modern life. We have an epidemic of isolation & loneliness in all age groups & strata of society. It isn't just the elderly & infirm who live solitary lives.
I go to the theatre, to the cinema, to exhibitions, I watch TV, but I miss the sharing of opinions & discussion. I know what I think, but everyone needs to have their opinions modified & enriched by someone else's.
People need people. We are social animals. We need communication & physical contact. Technology is my lifeline to the world. I'm lost without it. I Blog, I Email, I research, I text, I phone. It's better than a void of nothing, but none of that is the same as really sharing my life with someone else. It's nothing to do with sex or even love. It's to do with companionship.
Those who have it are very blessed.
Those who have empathetic friends who make the effort are blessed too.
This song by Ralph Mc Tell says it all beautifully.
http://www.cowboylyrics.com/lyrics/mctell-ralph/streets-of-london-11076.html
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