Shame, Guilt, & Regret

This trio of emotions about things that have happened, whether things we have done, or things we haven't and should have, can be destructive & are certainly negative. Whatever the act of commission or omission, it is done, in the past & can't be undone.

I think I have lived a fairly ordinary life, but I have definitely done things I shouldn't have. Things that probably hurt other people or things that would have hurt them had they known about them. I do regret my human weakness, but not to the extent that it weighs me down, being forever in my thoughts. I think that would be a waste of time & emotion. It wouldn't undo anything. It wouldn't make what I've done any less wrong. It wouldn't make anything right & it wouldn't be positive.

There are only a few things, fortunately, that I now see as shameful. But I don't go around cloaked in guilt. I can regret them happening without that regret ruining my life. As we age we should achieve greater understanding of ourselves & others. If we can learn from our mistakes & become better human beings we develop the skills of sympathy & empathy. We refine our moral code, that nagging thing in our gut that guides our behaviour. The important thing is to acknowledge the action or inaction & the impact of that on others.

Only a few, relatively, have done things so shameful that there is little possibility of forgiveness or redemption. For them we have to find ways of  justice & ways of stopping them from harming others.

Shame, guilt & regret should not be a burden which weighs most of us down & stops us from moving forward freely in a better way. We shouldn't be laden like donkeys. We should be able to trot or gallop onwards. Free spirits able to fly or amble as we chose.

"First do no harm" - Hippocrates. Seems straightforward enough to me, (but not easy to achieve).