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Sunday 28 May 2023

Ageing 2 - Having a Plan

A friend has just lent me Joan Bakewell's book "The Tick of Two Clocks". It isn't the first time she has written about ageing. She is a reflective, engaging & honest author. We in the UK don't interact enough with the ageing demographic. We certainly don't care for our elderly effectively & sympathetically. Elder care isn't just repeatedly kicked into the long grass, it's buried in jungle growth. We need action not "lip service".

There is research showing the best countries for the elderly to live in. According to Age UK the top 5 are Finland, Denmark, the Netherlands, Switzerland & Australia. The UK comes 17th. https://www.ageukmobility.co.uk/mobility-news/article/what-is-the-best-country-to-live-for-older-people

The UK has a tradition of Philanthropists who gave substantial sums of their money for housing the poor & elderly - Peabody, Rowntree, Cadbury, Guinness, Hill & Whiteley for example. Especially Victorians. Credit Suisse in 2021 show there are approximately 685,500 Britons in the richest 1%, with a total wealth of $3.4 trillion (£2.8 trillion). In comparison, approximately 48 million Britons, 70 per cent of the population, have a total wealth of $2.9 trillion (£2.4 billion). Where are the British philanthropists alleviating conditions for the poor, sick & elderly today ?

Individually many of us don't prepare for a possible long life either. It is, after all, our own responsibility, regardless of whether we have family, friends or neighbours to help. Willingness to help doesn't override the fact that people's lives today are complex & very busy. Social Care in the UK is at best hugely variable in accessibility or affordableness. At worst it simply isn't available if you can't afford to pay for it. 

I've come to the conclusion, as someone who is fortunate, that I have to "future proof" my life. I have to plan for possibly 5 more years of life. Average female life expectancy in the UK is 83. 

I have deliberately moved house since being widowed from a very rural hamlet to a city & then to a much smaller, more manageable, house. Accessibility to transport, services & infrastructure is important when you age. My current house is adapted so that I could, if necessary, live on the ground floor. I have a will & POA in place. Paperwork is kept reasonably up to date so my only child won't have the mess I had to deal with when my parents & parents in law died. Not to mention the mess my husband left. I am computer literate so could organise my whole life from my front room if I was housebound. I have a telephone alarm wristband in case I have an accident in my home. I'm not afraid of dying, but I don't fancy how my mother in law died - a fall in the shower & no one knew how long she had been on the floor before her hairdresser found her. Fortunately the hairdresser called the police. I have a Keysafe outside.

An older woman using her laptop computer at home

The thing is you have to face the inevitable - you are going to die. I know people who won't write a will. I know people who left it too late to downsize & sort out the accumulated detritus of a life. I know people who won't go to see a doctor when they should & justify it by saying they "don't want to bother the GP". I know people who are isolated, depressed, unwell & afraid. I also know people who are active, outgoing, acepting of ageing & great to be with.

Growing old can be the ending of a rich & full life. But it can also be no fun at all. It is a choice & we each have to make it. The thing is many people need support to do that & frankly it isn't here in the UK . 

That is our governments political choice & has been for years now despite numerous white papers, committees & reports. https://www.kingsfund.org.uk/publications/social-care-360

 



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