What I thought was a couple of reflective blogs has caused some concern among my readers. I'm not seriously ill or suicidal - just getting older! The thing is there isn't a road map for ageing. Maybe that's a good thing, no point in worrying people unnecessarily if they can't stop it happening. Just like having a baby, no one tells you exactly what will happen, although there is a lot more information about than when I had my daughter.
As I go through the process I begin to understand my parents & inlaws better. My life is very different to theirs, but there are themes that I now see repeating with me. I also see that I wasn't as understanding or sympathetic as I might have been. I guess that's always true. The young are busy with their own lives & concerns. Experience is a very good teacher.
Age brings obvious physical changes. I haven't seen anything that tells you what is normal - what to expect. Skin dry's out, hair gets thinner / coarser & more wayward, nails get ridged & thicker / brittle.....Age also brings mental changes - day to day memory lapses, a brain which feels as if it's made of Gruyere cheese, with thoughts lost in black holes. I swear I can almost see a thought drifting away from my conciousness like a balloon freed from a childs hand.
I also think that personality changes & becomes more polarised. I am nothing like as volatile emotionally as I once was. I know it's a waste of time to errupt & it does more harm to the person who is errupting. On he other hand I have seen for myself people older than me who seem to have distilled down to their more negative and unplesant character traits. This is particularly true when people have dementia of some form or other.
Just like the rest of life, ageing is what you make of it. Possibly the fact that I have seen firsthand how difficult the elderly can be will help me to avoid the pitfalls. On the other hand maybe it was ever thus & we just kid ourselves "it will never happen to me"
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