This too Shall Pass

Late June & early July isn't a good time for me. June starts with fathers day, followed by the anniversary of the accident, 15 years ago, that landed my husband, (literally, by helicopter), in intensive care in the last week of June. Then there are the anniversaries of his death on our 43rd wedding anniversary, his funeral, and his 67th birthday the day after. All of this triggers a range of emotions, from huge sadness to anger at the waste. He was up a ladder on his own & fell onto concrete. 

Iris Murdoch, a philosopher & writer, had a theory of "Unselfing". This involves turning away from ourselves and being attentive to the world before us. We should open our eyes to reality & detach ourselves from our ego. It's a simple idea, but boy is it hard to do.

It does fit in with my core Buddhist beliefs, but the ego is very dominant & can be pernicious. Emotional thinking is unhelpful thinking. A person bases their views of and makes conclusions about situations, themselves or other people, on the way that they are feeling. On the other hand rational decision making is based on logical reasoning.

I know all of this intellectually. But there are times when my emotions become dominant & it is really hard to subdue that. There are things that help;-

• Being active - swimming is my meditative life saver.
• Reading, doing things I enjoy
  
• Watching interesting & informative documentaries which show me how wonderful our world is, but also how much is wrong. There are always people far worse off than I am.
• Socialising
• Volunteering, giving my life purpose

It is true that "this too shall pass". The saying is believed to originate from 13th century Persia, where it was sung by Sufi artists like Rumi and Attar. Change is inevitable, little is permanent. We have to embrace that, especially in the unstable world we live in.

 

 We do have to have hope, but we also each have to be prepared to make an effort.